Monthly Study Guide - May, 2024
New to the academy? We're well aware how confusing it can be. Every month we'll post a study guide to make sure you don't miss a thing! After all, you know the penalty for failing out. Don't risk it!
New this month:
A Xenolinguistic Analysis of a Few Lines of Ancient Verse
Consider this poem: After you jump With eyes shut tight Against abrading wind How will you know If you fly or fall Until you hit the ground? Xenolinguistic analysis suggests the following concerning the author to be true at the time the poem was written:
Old Demons of the First Class
The newest language the oldest intelligible-to-students Professor Emeritus speaks is a truly ancient dialect of Sumerian. Thankfully Sumerian stayed popular for a good long while as a not-very-changey liturgical language and I was able to get permission to set up a “Telephone Game”-style daisy chai…
Textbook Available for Purchase!
What’s the point of being a professor if you can’t require your students to pay for your overpriced textbook to boost your sales figures, publication stats, and meager professorial income? Well, obviously it’s to pursue knowledge for its own sake and impart that knowledge by instruction, devious trickery, and occasionally brute force and/or nonconsensual…
Older material
NEW SERIES! The Student Experience!
Still trying to get your bearings? These might help you out:
News from aboveground! Not guaranteed to be accurate, though…
Core Curriculum: You Will Be Tested on This Material
Undeath: A Manual—the popular 5-part series starts here!
More will be coming. Don’t fall behind!